Apple unveils low-cost Cornea display

Cupertino, CA — Retina display too rich for your blood? What you need is “the display for the rest of us.”

Say hello to Apple’s super-affordable Cornea display.

This new display, along with the classic display and Retina display, forms a whole family of 15-inch Mac laptops.

Thanks to Apple’s new simplified naming system, you can now choose among a MacBook Pro, a MacBook Pro or a MacBook Pro.

But clearly it’s the Cornea display (choice #3) that’s getting all the attention now.

To achieve greater economy while staying true to Apple’s high standards, the Cornea display aims for quality, not quantity.

“The Cornea display has only 10,000 pixels compared to the Retina display’s 5 million pixels,” according to Apple’s press release. “But they’re incredibly good pixels.”

Just how good are they? Given the new display’s 120×90 resolution, a single Cornea pixel is literally 500x the size of a Retina pixel — an accomplishment that’s wowing the Apple-watchers.

“There are so many damn pixels in a Retina display, you can barely distinguish one from the next,” says Wall Street analyst Gene Munster. “With Cornea technology, you can literally savor each pixel from five feet away.”

The Cornea display does force users to accept certain compromises. Dock icons, for example, are reduced to a 3×3 pixel square — which may present a challenge for developers.

As usual, Apple’s critics have been quick to react. “This is an outrage,” says a Dell spokesperson. “This is Apple’s first move into the inferior product market space, and they’re praised as an innovator. Dell has been making inferior products for years and gets no credit.”


  1. Nooobodeey |

    laughing my ass of :DDD really good work again 😀 dell gets no credits :DDDD

  2. Diff |

    This is a tease. What’s the price?

    • Jackbcohen |

      $3000… it takes a lot to make each pixel

  3. Anon |

    Oh great! Now I have to take my iBalls out when using this thing. Wonderful! Apple is all about the money.

  4. psdesignuk |

    Shut up and take my money!

  5. thesillyoldbear |

    As long as they keep the 24-bit-deep color space…what? it’s only 23 bits?

  6. Jean-Mathieu Potvin |

    Awesome article, as always. ”Dell has been making inferior products for years and gets no credit.” Divine conclusion.

  7. David Wales |

    I hear that the creators of Minecraft are preparing a lawsuit about this product.

    • Anonymous |

      They only will when you have to craft the computer.

      • kammak |

        mojang (creators of minecraft) dont make lawsuits but recieve a lot

      • unknown1289 |

        guess they will blow it up

    • Benedict_rang |

      Mojang? Being sensible and filing a lawsuit? Honestly, have you never heard of the creeper?

  8. Paweł Kata |

    I love this blog! Great article!

  9. Duckwithnukes |

    “Coincidentially, Samsung has just announced the Galaxy CorNote, a strange 5.5“ device with a stylus that only has one pixel.
    Samsung strongly denies any suggestions that it was inspired by Apple’s Cornea Display. In a statement released today, the Korean electronics giant said, ‘We’ve been making crappy products for years. Apple needs to stop claiming that they invented the world.'”

  10. Anonymous |

    Dell deserves credit for their inferior products.

  11. Anonymous |


  12. whoamI |

    watching uncensored porn………………………………………….. FAILED

  13. ashoo |

    HA HA AH AHAHHA ! One of the Laugh riot articles off late !.. amazing article.. The concluding line ” Dell has been ….” is a just a cheery on the top ..Super article..:)

  14. gctwnl |

    In a year or three, Microsoft will announce the ‘Pixel’: a single pixel tablet running Windows 8P Tablet Edition Home (and Mobile Home) Premium De Luxe with a special stylus that can press enough of the Pixel’s screen to get the system to notice the user action. Ballmer will be on stage touting the ‘utter simplicity’ of the tablet and explain a enthusiastic audience of the Apollo Comedy Night how it will become a huge success.

  15. boredumb |

    So, when does the new 27″ Apple Cornea Display come out?

  16. Pingback: [email protected] | What we talked about in July 2012

  17. Anonymous |

    Whats the crafting recipe?

  18. Joe |

    Come on, Scoopertino – this has been up for 3 weeks. Where’s our new scoop?

    • scoopertino |

      Nothing worse than an unreliable fake news organization. New Scoop coming soon!

  19. arne.viman |

    Revolutionary Dynadisp[™] technology where a finite amount of pixels move dynamically across the screen at blazing speed to those areas of the screen requiring detail. Other flat areas can do with much lesser pixels.

  20. Neil Banerjee |

    Dell is great, what do you mean…

  21. Jordan |

    i actually waited for the rez to improve, like it wasnt finished loading -_-

Leave a Reply