New York, NY — Faced with diminishing news coverage following the release of Obama’s birth certificate, Donald Trump has shifted his sites to a new target:
Apple CEO Steve Jobs.
Appearing on Fox News, the terminally egotistical mogul put it bluntly.
“Look,” said Trump, “Steve Jobs wants to be president. The Constitution says only humans can be president. So let’s see the proof. So far he hasn’t proved squat.”
According to Trump, it’s almost inconceivable that any earthly being could revolutionize four industries while he has failed to revolutionize any.
“I’m not saying he’s not human,” said Trump. “I’m just saying we have the right to verify.”
Trump has offered up some intriguing theories to explain the existence of Jobs. “He could be an extraterrestrial, he could be the product of genetic experiments, or — the greatest of ironies — he could be an android,” he says.
Asked by a customer to weigh in on Trump’s outburst, Steve Jobs replied with one of his typically brief emails: “Klaatu barada nikto.”