Apple stuns Google, unveils iGlass

iGlassCupertino, CA — Coming soon: Google Glass. Shipping today: Apple iGlass.

That was the theme pounded nonstop by Apple executives at today’s surprise press event.

“iGlass doesn’t just change the way you interact with the world, it shows you a better world,” said Tim Cook.

Quite literally, this is a device that lets customers see the world through Apple-colored glasses.

Bad news? Not with iGlasses. With Disaster Detection built in, you'll never see another painful headline again.

Bad news? Not with iGlasses. With Disaster Detection built in, nasty headlines are rewritten in real time.

Take “Disaster Detection,” for example. If a newspaper headline fails to meet Apple standards, iGlass literally re-writes it in real time. (See inset to the right.)

Is iGlass easy to use? You bet.

“If you know how to blink,” said Cook, “you know how to use iGlass.”

Just single-blink to take a photo. Double-blink to shoot a video. But that’s just the start.

Advanced users can create left-winks and right-winks to access system settings and customized commands.

Apple partners have signed on in a big way. Instagram has created a quadruple-blink/right-wink combo command that takes a photo, applies your favorite filter, then automatically uploads to your Instagram account.

If a user should ever become confused or perform an accidental blink/wink, a simple eye-roll returns you to the home screen.

“Can’t innovate anymore, my glass!” said a beaming Phil Schiller, echoing his memorable quip from Apple’s WWDC earlier this year.

But how did Apple beat Google to the punch? Is iGlass really ready for prime time? Cook was straightforward in answering that very question.

“Apple Maps taught us a lot,” he said. “We call our new philosophy ‘SARU’: ship, apologize, revise and update. I guarantee, you’re going to love iGlass. Eventually.”

  • Winfred de Ruijter

    Great story again. Already trying the quadruple-blink/right-wink combo…

  • ashu

    “Can’t innovate anymore, my glass!” said a beaming Phil Schiller … This is the Line of the article..

    Awesome writing again

  • Jayesh Panchal

    loved article a lot.
    planning to order now so that I won’t need to read boring books.
    it gonna change the text in realtime to something interesting…. (Y)

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  • Chris Hauk

    So, it has a built-in reality distortion device, just like Steve did?

  • Evan

    Hahaha awesome….

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  • Bara Minata

    The wink-blink-wink-blink will be patented, of course.

  • Gffhgtgy

    Blink blink

  • boredumb

    Well, I’m a little disappointed…I mean, it’s cool that it has the “wink-wink”,
    but, where’s the “nudge-nudge”???

  • Tardroid

    MEH. waiting for the retina version.

  • Bob T. Panda

    I have a headache.

  • denbo68

    The only downside is that it leaves Apple fanboi’s with that empty “deer in the headlights” look…. but then again all Apple products have that effect on them.

  • Me

    There’s an app for that.

  • Me

    iGlass looks “in your general direction”

  • http://singingstring.org/ asongbird

    HILARIOUS!

  • plusaf

    Glasses look cool on the model, but the lipstick is too red for the suit, shirt, etc…

  • rolovr@gmail.com

    ….so…. Apple’s now releasing beta products to be able to say they’re still innovative while capitalizing on someone else’s idea (and then rushing it to market)?

  • Tim

    I just love sarcasm ;)

  • ASDF WARRIOR

    everytime you blink you take a photo.. wtf xD

  • Michael Rowland

    Classic!