Apple introduces iHand: the right way to hold your iPhone

Cupertino, CA — Ladies and gentlemen, a big hand for iPhone. Literally.

Responding to complaints that the new iPhone 4 loses signal when held by a human hand, Apple today launched iHand — a synthetic appendage that makes it easy for anyone to “get a grip” on iPhone and remain connected.

iHand is so easy to use, it doesn’t require a manual. Simply insert iPhone 4 into iHand’s adjustable fingers, raise it to your ear and start talking. With iHand, you get all the functionality of the human hand, without the signal-sucking biology that encumbers most iPhone owners.

“If you’re serious about using iPhone, there’s a right way and wrong way to hold it,” Apple explains in its press release. “iHand guarantees the proper grip first time, every time.”

Featuring Apple’s unibody design, iHand is precision-carved from a single piece of European beechwood. So it’s lighter than a standard medical prosthesis, yet 12x stronger. You can grip iHand either of two ways: by placing your fingers around its palm, or by grasping the aluminized Extender that telescopes from the wrist socket.

iHand's built-in Extender provides the perfect reach

The Extender adds up to 24 inches of reach, allowing the user’s biological hand to be positioned anywhere between ear and waist for maximum comfort. You can even use the Extender to hold your iPhone up to a friend’s or colleague’s ear.

iHand is available through the Apple Store for $69, and comes in ten popular pigmentations. Third-party “skins” for iHand offering additional colorings, beauty marks, scars and a “hairy hand” option will be available by the end of July.

92 Comments

  1. Love the scoop! |

    Scoopertino you are always a breath of fresh air to make my day (especially with all the other ill informed ranting that is going on on other sites).

  2. Jimmie V |

    I just received mine. It truly does work! As a bonus it makes a great back scratcher!

  3. john |

    Damn, you beat me! I figured it was going to be the iGlove.

  4. Steve |

    Hilarious!!!
    I’m opting for the long awaited, soon to be released, iPed…
    Same idea but in foot form—allowing for truly hands free operation!

  5. Mac |

    You’ve _got_ to be kidding me. A serious flaw in the construction of the new iPhone to be solved _this_ way?!
    How stupid do I look with this in my hand?

    • Paddington Bear |

      You know this is a joke right?

    • Shoaib Musse |

      iThink you look very stupid

  6. Mac |

    Oh, ….oh..crap!.. OH! You _got_ me! Now I get it, he he.
    Well, I’m from Barcelona..

  7. Ryan Arter |

    Talk to the hand!!

  8. Oliver |

    must have … 😉

  9. Nikolas |

    L O L

  10. gabri109 |

    Finally, Kermit can use his brand new iphone 4. Good move, Apple.

  11. Lisa |

    iHandjob

    • Caleb Gale |

      hi taylor

    • Guest |

      wen are they making the i blow job

  12. Rhonda |

    Thanks for the laugh. I have posted this on facebook. See it at: Things Which Make Me Laugh.

  13. G_pro |

    it’s weird if you have to use iHand
    just for a call

    the best solution is the product must be pulled back from market
    and apple must fix the problem

    u must always serve the best for your customer

    it’s a fail product

    in my opinion

  14. Anonymous |

    Lol ppl paid good money for their phones and other phones and it doesnt work and this is the solution to the problem. And for the most part, most ppl hold their phones and OTHER phones anyway they like and the reception is still good/ rather it still maintains a proper signal, and now Apple says its because the way they hold the phones, thats why its a problem. I think after paying hundreds of dollars for this phone I dont need a big company like Apple to limit me by saying I cannot hold a phone they way I like or how I hold EVERY OTHER PHONE which does not give me this problem.

  15. Steve Jobs |

    Oh you guys! You got me.

  16. web design china |

    WOW, that’s the way I like.Handy ihand

  17. Stupidman |

    what a stupid solution from biggest smartphone manufacture due the they last stupidity release.

  18. olemaru |

    wtf iphone..come out with this stupid?come on dun think of earning money then come out with this stuff.might as well i get nokia.get loss off iphone stupid.

  19. Walter |

    It’s finally worth it… – if only for this.

    Is there a word for self inflicted Schadenfreude???

  20. fastblogger |

    The iphone is so good you should buy a robot extra to use ist lol

    regards
    Maik

  21. Some weird guy on the street |

    I want that Kermit one.

  22. iDude |

    i actually do wish this one was for real, i would buy one of these. this would likely be a big-seller if someone went into production on it…

  23. button |

    Could have been worse, i’m expecting Apple to launch itape so you just tape the phone to your head so you don’t even need to hold it at all

    • iFriend |

      Or you know, iBluetooth?

  24. eric |

    Have left hand can buy? lol

  25. Hearing |

    Considering I have to hold the phone in my left Hand since I had my right hand amputated in an accident seems a little wrong for apple not to consider that, then again I should have guessed it being an Apple product it’s only for the elitist

  26. Cazza |

    Are some of you guys serious ?? Did you actually think this was Apple’s solution ?? LOL !!! The article is funny but you guys are a riot 🙂

  27. dweebmann |

    I used an iFanboy to hold mine. It’s a life-sized replica of a real human being, but with a built in antenna booster.
    I love my iFriend.

    • Pilgrim |

      Do you have the model with the head cavity for the iFrenchToast replica?

  28. Ace |

    What??? No option for a tatoo on the iHand? Come on Apple, lets have some real iOptions.

  29. boris |

    hahahahahahahah

  30. Deepta |

    Can I middle finger move to extend the middle finger 🙂

  31. Cordelia Pou |

    It would be nice if I knew how/where to
    purchase the iHand. So cool.
    I Love it!!!!

  32. chayim |

    Lol wow you guys make it look like it’s really on the apple website. love it

  33. Pretty Girl |

    All I want to know is when are they going to release INailPolish for the IHand. I like to be co-ordinated. LOL ;o]

    • Maharshi Bhattacharya |

      just after they release the iPick for picking our nose!! XD

  34. Web Design Genius |

    This is hilarious! I’m so happy I found this site – Where have you guys been hiding? Awesome awesome awesome.

  35. Globinch |

    Hmm.. iHand and when we will get an iEye?

    • BANG725 |

       *iBall out now

  36. mavrick3 |

    New Sextoy?

  37. iPhone Screen Repair |

    This is absolutely rediculous. The fact that the new iPhone screen does not allow the transmission of the radio waves is just plain poor engineering. The fact that you need to hold the iPhone a certain way is just stupid.

  38. Edwas |

    Hola,
    scoopertino.com – da mejor. Guardar va!
    Gracias

    Edwas

  39. Michael Ch'ng |

    LMAO.. what great GADGET

  40. Brendan Crawford |

    amputation lol

  41. Danny3650 |

    what is next pay $1000 bucks to hold iphone with a ihand USE YOUR OWN HANDS PEOPLE!!! IS FREE

    • Keaton Webb |

      Are you crazy? I’m getting the iHand Kermit™.

    • Aistano |

      Im officially inviting you to argue with my iHand.

  42. HAND IN HAND |

    take my hand..WTF was apple thinking…

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  45. sid |

    LMAAAOOOOOOOOOOO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

    this should considered failblog quality . lol ~~!!!

  46. The Most Awesome Person |

    I love how people think this is real. 

    • ron |

      you could’ve gone like..

      iLove how people…

  47. 3kandy |

    This thing works great!!! I just bought it at the apple store. I never had a problem with reception of my iPhone 4 but the multi purpose design allows for many uses. I’m white, but I decided to go with the darker skin model cuz my iPhone is the black one. A+++++++++++ would buy again

  48. Anonymous |

    Ha! Types of hands, “iHand Kermit”

  49. Nimrod |

    I bought two; one for my iPhone and one for my balls.

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